Jan 23, 2007

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Boll Weevil: Miss Xa Xa Continues Her Trip South to See Chef Carlos

Ah, Miss Xa Xa has reached Savannah! A city filled with exquisite magnolia perfume and decorated with long swaying strands of Spanish Moss. She'lll be spending her second night in this superb southern city as she wends her way south to meet Chefs Carlos and Chuck at the Hi-Life Cafe.

We eavesdrop in on Ms. Place and Miss Xa Xa's cell phone conversation to find out what these two friends are up to:

Ms. Place: "Dahling! You're in Savannah! Land of Southern Hospitality and that fahbulous Johnny Mercer. Am tres jaloux."

Miss Xa Xa: "Thank you, dahling. Am staying with a friend, Lady Chablis. You heard of her?"

"That fabulous creature from "Club One? The one known as The Doll, Y'Mama?" Was she not famously quoted as saying, "Two tears in a bucket, mother, f*ket?"

"Good recall...she's so OUT there, and leaves nothing to the imagination...so provocative. We all should be like her.

"Dahling, I agree. Chablis is sooo USA Southern Belle. I adore her knack for sexy dresses, strip shows, and generous gentlemen of whatever race and gender!"

"Yes, well, as you know I LIVE by her famous credo, being a brunette like her!"

"Of course you would, dahling. Isn't Chablis friends with that dahling man, Johnny Mercer? The song writer who resembles Charlus?"

"Ah, yes. They do look somewhat alike, don't they? Johhny put out this sweet, dear record, which Charlus and I so enjoyed over the holidays."

"And don't forget Moon River, dahling. His opus extraordinaire."

"Oh, how I wish I could stay longer in Savannah! Well, dahling, gotta meet Bobby and Steph at the Waterfront. We're visiting Bobby's fave restaurants and sampling the most divine Southern dishes."

"Ta, Miss Xa Xa! As you continue your journey, I'll leave you with the immortal words of Lee Smith, your fave southern writer: 'The biggest myth about Southern women is that we are frail types--fainting on our sofas...nobody where I grew up every acted like that. We were about as fragile as coal trucks.' Ha!"

"Thanks, dahling. I just adore that woman. Will ring you again when I reach Florida!"


Lisette said...

One of my best friends grew up in GA and I have never forgotten the advice she gave me. "Honey, you don't understand. Men LIKE to be manipulated." (said in a heavy southern drawl)

Anonymous said...

i want to see live stream of miss Xa Xa eating carlos(' food) that is...

BigAssBelle said...

oh my, it's so fabulous to live vicariously through Miss Xa Xa's southern journey. i am thrilled!!